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Posts Tagged ‘I Frankenstein’

I am not a film critic, I don’t have to watch anything I don’t want to, therefore if I watch something rubbish its my own stupid fault.  In no particular order the worst films I saw at the cinema in 2014 are:

Pompeii: What could have been a fun action disaster movie fails mainly because of the poor handling of the main character, Vesuvius.Pompeii

The Last Days on Mars: Made the most of its small budget and the acting isn’t that bad, but the plot and script are terrible.The Last Days on Mars

Need For Speed: A silly story with questionable acting, portly choreographed action, and worst of all, no fun.Need For Speed

A Long Way Down: Well cast and well acted but the very sharp and funny Nick Hornby novel is lost in the atrocious script.A Long Way Down

Transformers: Age Of Extinction: Marginally better than  Dark of the Moon.Transformers Age Of Extinction

Brick Mansions: to be honest it isn’t terrible, it just so far short of District 13 on which it is based.Brick Mansions

The Pyramid: Silly horror that fails on every level.  It’s makers can’t even decide if it is a found footage movie or not.The Pyramid

Magic in the Moonlight: A great cast is wasted in a whimsical comedy that spent so much time and effort on whimsy it  forgot to be funny.Magic in the Moonlight

Dracula Untold: Luke Evans isn’t terrible but the film is totally pointless and dull, it gives the impression that it was written by someone who hasn’t read Bram Stoker novel.Dracula Untold

I, Frankenstein: The people behind Underworld rehash their own idea and put Frankenstein’s monster at the centre, it really doesn’t work.I Frankenstein

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January’s Oscar bait has given way to a more varied month:

Out of the Furnace: An allegory of modern society with a plot and melancholy reminiscent of a Bruce Springsteen song. The performances are great but the story never finds the right momentum.Out of the Furnace

Dallas Buyers Club: The true story of a homophobic Texan who discovers he is HIV positive. In looking for a way to prolong his own life he becomes an unlikely saviour for other sufferers. The always reliable Matthew McConaughey gives a career best performance and is a real contender for the best actor Oscar.Matthew McConaughey for Dallas Buyers Club

I, Frankenstein: Have you seen Underworld? Imagine the same story with werewolves and vampires replaced with gargoyles and demons, then drop Frankenstein’s now 200 year old monster into the story. Its as mad and sadly as bad as it sounds.I Frankenstein

Robocop: remake of Paul Verhoeven’s satire on totalitarianism and consumerism lacks doesn’t do much wrong and has a few interesting things to say, but it lacks the heart and edge of the original. To make matters worse its 20 minutes longer than the original.Robocop

Lone Survivor: True story of four US Navy SEALs whose mission to take out a Taliban commander goes wrong. Reminiscent of and at times a brutal as Black Hawk Down. There is an interesting moral question at the centre of the film but is limited by the one sided political point of view.Lone Survivor

The Monuments Men: True story of the a group of art experts and their race against time to save Europe’s art from the Nazis at the end of WWII. The likeable all star cast is on great form but the film is uneven and lacks direction.Still from Monuments Men

Jack Strong: Polish cold war thriller based on the true story. A Polish army officer who spied for the west in soviet controlled Poland. Thoughtful and often tense thriller. It sadly won’t find the audience it would have if it was in English.Jack Strong

Her: Spike Jonze’s near future tale of a man who falls in love with an artificial intelligence computer operating system. Some good ideas but it feels a little cold and falls flat. The casting of a voice as distinctive as Scarlett Johansson is also very distracting.Her

Only Lovers Left Alive: Jim Jarmusch’s take on a vampire movie lacks action, horror and a plot, none of this matters. It leaves me asking the question, why hasn’t anyone cast Tom Hiddleston or Tilda Swinton as a vampire before?Only Lovers Left Alive

I have spent the entire month thinking Dallas Buyers Club would be movie of the month, it isn’t! Movie of the month is: Only Lovers Left Alive.only lovers left alive poster

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